Steph/ven and the Forgetful Day

One cold morning in December, as Steph/ven was getting ready to go to work, he realised that he had to get something out of the freezer for his dinner. "I must get something out for dinner," he said to Lady Chocolat.

"Yes," she replied. "I told you that last night."

"Did you?" Steph/ven asked. "I forgot." And then Lady Chocolat left, for there were eager minds to be filled with all the wonders of English.

As he prepared his breakfast, Steph/ven noted that he had now eaten the last of the Shredded Wheat. (Note: Steph/vens, much like Tiggers, do not like Shredded Wheat. However, as it is awfully good for them, Steph/vens persist in eating Shredded Wheat. Tiggers do not. This may go some way to explaining their respective demeanours.)

"I'll need to go to Tesco to get some more Shredded Wheat," Steph/ven said to himself. "I'll go when I collect that order this evening. That reminds me: I must take the order confirmation with me when I go to work."

Next, Steph/ven had a shower. This created a lot of steam, which filled the entire bathroom, and caused the window to steam up. Steph/ven therefore opened the window. "I must remember to close that before I go. Or else who knows what might get in?" (Although Steph/ven and Lady Chocolat live in a top-floor flat, Steph/ven lives in mortal dread that an organised gang of spider thieves might come in and steal all his webs. Not that he has any webs, being a Steph/ven and not a spider, but how could they know that?)

Later, after he had dressed and taken his neck medicine, Steph/ven left the apartment. He made sure to lock the front door, for Steph/vens also live in mortal dread of non-spider thieves, and went to his car. This was covered in frost, but was quickly cleared, and Steph/ven was on his way!

It was not long, however, before Steph/ven had a horrible realisation. "Bother!" he said to himself. "I have forgotten to close the bathroom window. Truly, I am a person of very little brain."

So Steph/ven turned the car around, and returned to the flat. No spider-thief was going to steal his webs! And so he went all the way back, up up up the stairs, and back into the apartment, and then to the bathroom. He closed the window, went back out the door, locked it again, returned down the stairs, and again left for work.

This time, Steph/ven travelled as far as the M9, that great motorway that connects the great cities of Edinburgh and Stirling, before he again realised his mistake. "Oh no! I have forgotten to bring my order confirmation!"

Alas, it was too late to go back. Steph/ven continued on his way to work. As he went, he recounted the list of things he had to do in the evening, once he returned home: make his lunch for tomorrow, make dinner for himself and Lady Chocolat...

Silly Steph/ven - he has taken nothing out of the freezer! Today really is a most forgetful day!