Ready Player One

G and I went to see the film of "Ready Player One" on Monday - LC and I had hoped to go together, but the timing with Funsize didn't really work out. As I mentioned on the blog, I had read the book last month, so I was curious to see how they'd translated it to film. I was also somewhat doubtful - with the book fresh in my mind, and given that the book is always * better, how would the film stack up?

* Not always - the actual rule is that the first version is always better. But since, these days, I'm much more likely to see a film that has been adapted from a book, rather than reading the book of the film, that effectively means the book is better. Anyway...

I didn't like RP1.

From here on out there are major spoilers for both the book and the film. So, if you want to avoid them, skip the rest of this post - there's nothing at the end to come back to!

The truth is that the book of RP1 is basically a piece of lightweight fluff, with an extremely basic plot. The only real reason it is so well regarded is that 80's nostalgia is big right now, and the book wallows unashamedly in it. And that's fair enough - there's a place for lightweight fluff, and there's a good reason that particular plot is retold again and again. And there were a couple of really quite clever moments... in addition to some quite lame ones.

In theory, the film version should be much the same. Indeed, they took the wise step of replacing most of the geek references from the book with other geek references in the film. Which means that it's fundamentally the same, but should also be different enough to stand on its own.

Unfortunately, it really felt to me like all the things they'd changed were for the worse, and all the things they kept were weaknesses in the book. Mostly, then, it made me nostalgic for other, better films - and knowing that I have many of those films on DVD, and many of the others are shown fairly regularly on TV, I'm left wondering why bother with RP1 - just watch those other films instead!

The problems start pretty much right away. One of the big changes between the book and the film, at least in gamer circles, was the replacement of the "Tomb of Horrors" with an unwinnable race. On the face of it, that's wise, since the book both gets the Tomb wrong and then has the protagonist play against Acererack at "Joust" which is, frankly, lame. So switching to something more cinematic and being able to introduce all the characters very quickly should be a good thing.

Except...

One of the few genuinely clever parts of the book is the placement of the Tomb on the school-planet of Ludus. Which is a Latin pun, but also shows one of Halliday's key values - you don't need money to win at his quest.

Switching to the unwinnable race removes that. Suddenly, you do need money, for vehicles, fuel, etc, in order to meaningfully compete.

Unfortunately, it also makes everyone in the setting an idiot. The notion, in the book, that nobody found the Tomb in five years of searching is a stretch, but it's just about feasible - it's hidden in plain sight, but somewhere nobody would really think to look.

But faced with an unwinnable race, coded by someone who is known to have a great delight in Easter Eggs, and in five whole years of searching, we're expected to believe that nobody thought to look for secret doors?

Hell, there's a real good chance that somebody's grandma would find that one entirely by accident!

But, okay, I guess.

Then we come to the next problems in the film: the supporting cast. Specifically, Art3mis and Aech. In the book, these are very much peers of our hero. Indeed, both are actually much more established Gunters than Parzival - if anything, Aech is the mentor figure, while Art3mis is actually better at it all than Parzival, but has missed one lucky guess.

In the film, Art3mis is introduced almost immediately as needing Parzival to rescue her. Then, when they decamp to Aech's workshop, he proceeds to inflict on her a test for "fake geek girls" (where the supposed geek girl must prove her credentials by recognising each and every reference the gatekeeper can muster - and yes, it's exactly as offensive as that sounds). Why they thought that was a good idea to include, I'm not sure.

Aech, meanwhile, is recast mostly as comic relief, and notably in the middle section of the film. On the face of it, this section is really good, transporting the characters into "The Shining". It's really well done, except for one thing - we're supposed to accept that Aech has never seen the film (because he "doesn't like scary movies"). When pretty much the sole qualification to be a Gunter is to immerse yourself in the culture loved by Halliday, and when that's one of his top films, that rather negates Aech's claim to competence.

Most of the rest of that middle section is absolutely fine - sure, they bring together the "High Five" in the real world rather more quickly than in the book, but that's fairly harmless. And, frankly, they should have killed off Daito (as in the book), as again that was one of the few things that gave it any weight. Oh well.

One other big change to the film is the means by which Parzival comes by his Extra Life. In the book, he stumbles on another Easter Egg, 'wastes' quite a lot of time on what seems a red herring, and so comes by a priceless artifact. In the film, he is basically given the Extra Life on a whim by another character... just because. But, I guess, in a 2 hour 20 minute film they can't include everything.

But then we come to the end, where it all proceeds to fall apart.

In another change from the book, Art3mis is captured by the enemy and sent to one of their "Loyaly Centres" (because, of course, the female character is the one who should be captured and need a rescue). The bad guys then proceed to show their massive incompetence - they put her to work inside the impregnable shield. For the main reason that if they didn't, the plot would come to a screaming halt.

So, of course, the heroes get Art3mis out of her prison, but she stays within the Matrix in order to bring down the shield. The bad guys, realising that she must still be inside, proceed to run around desperately trying to locate her. You'd think they'd have mechanisms to determine which of their rigs is currently using her unique login ID, or at the very least a mechanism to lock her out of the system, or something. (Also, see below...)

While Art3mis is busy bringing down the shield, Parzival and the others whistle up an army. In the book, this takes some time - they make the announcement, set a date, and wait to see who shows up. In the film, Parzival makes his speech and the army shows up seconds later. This highlights something really quite important - it takes very little time to get around in that setting.

So, they have the big fight. It's standard stuff these days - a mess of CGI fighting it out, with very little ability to actually see what's going on. It's all very pretty, but mostly just a waste of time. Especially since we've seen it all before.

Anyway, the good guys win, leading to the bad guys using their Ultimate Weapon - a bomb that kills all avatars in Sector 14. Except Parzival, of course, since he has the Extra Life. This therefore gives him a free run to the final challenge, and since he knows how to solve it, he can do so in a few minutes.

Except...

For those few minutes, he has to stand right there out in the open. And as we've just discussed, it takes little to no time to travel to his location. So it's a matter of a few seconds of one of the bad guys' reserve forces to go there and shoot his avatar dead. And the bad guys win.

(The book addresses this point - when you engage with the final challenge, you get shunted into a pocket dimension where you can't be interfered with. So Parzival gets a few minutes' head start, but can't be stopped by a simple bullet. The film omits this, to its cost.)

Anyway, our bad guys don't bother with any of that. Instead, they rush around in the real world trying to stop our heroes. Which is nicely cinematic but hugely inefficient. Especially as they've been shown to have drones that are quite capable of delivering an explosive package. So it would be nice and easy for them to find the van, drop off some explosives. And the bad guys win.

Anyway, they don't do that. Instead, they get themselves defeated, their agent gets himself arrested, and our heroes win the game. Yay!

Except, again...

When Art3mis was imprisoned in the "Loyalty Centre", she wasn't being detailed illegally. Instead, she had been assessed as owing the company some thousands of dollars that she needed to work off. And while working it off, she would be charged for any failure to do her job, any damage to company equipment, and pretty much anything else they felt like charging her for. And, indeed, they company had been shown to be utter bastards about that - indeed, that was exactly what they had done to her father.

Now, Art3mis wasn't an observer in the final battle; she was very much an active participant. And, indeed, she triggered the battle by disabling a priceless one-use artifact.

So, being utter bastards, and given that they had just lost the contest directly as a result of the actions of someone who (a) has just been given a fifth of the prize and (b) who represents significant leverage on the other four winners, the bad guys would surely not simply take that lying down. Sure, a couple of their agents had just been arrested, but corporations have rogue employees all the time, of course, so they can be easily disavowed.

Our bad guys, therefore, should just levy absurd charges to Art3mis' account, potentially charging her for everything that was lost in the final battle, including the priceless one-use artifact. At the very least, that gives them a 20% control in the system; most likely, it leads to the other winners buying her out. And the bad guys win.

The upshot of all this, I'm afraid, was that I was unimpressed.

Ultimately, the film is very pretty, but it's also pretty dull - a very basic plot, very thin characters, and a requirement that the bad guys make really bad mistakes at key times just left me cold. It reminded me too much of better films, and didn't have enough in itself for me to recommend it. Which is a shame, though maybe something I should have expected.

Day 100: Update on... Stuff

It's day 100, so time for another update...

Books: By day 100, I 'should' be at 16.44 books read. I'm currently at 15 and a bit, so I'm some way behind. I had actually caught up last month, but "A Fine Balance" took me ages to get through.

In terms of the actual goal I set, I'm just about on target, in that I've read 3 of the remaining books, leaving a further 8 (or 7 - "Hamlet"). But given that "A Fine Balance" was one of them, and they're getting harder...

Band: Things have been going well, but there's not much to report since last time. We do have a heavy schedule of gala days and similar events for the summer, but I won't be doing them all. In fact, unless they sort out what they're doing with getting me a uniform, I might not be doing any of them!

Gaming: Nothing to report since last time.

Weight: I got back to the gym just before going back on holiday, which was a good thing. Between that and carrying Funsize around, I've actually lost about half a stone, which is good.

Blogging: This has fallen way behind, with me not having posted anything on either blog this month. We'll see if that rate picks up any over the next while.

And leaving the most important until last...

Project Tadpole: As noted, this came to its end in February. Funsize is due to be baptised on Sunday. Beyond that, though, I won't be reporting on events in these regular updates, though I daresay I may mention her once or twice elsewhere in the blog!

Until next time...

#14: "A Fine Balance", by Rohinton Mistry (a book from The List)
#15: "Pathfinder: Crownfall", by Thurston Hillman

Why the Return of Optimus Prime is a Bad Thing

This blog is never one to shy away from controversial topics, nor from addressing the burning issues of the day, and so we come to a blog post that may surprise some.

A few weeks ago, as part of my project to retire my Region One DVDs, I purchased a set of the Transformers DVDs for series 2-4. I'm now nearly at the end of my watch-though, with only two episodes in series 3 (plus the 3 episodes of series 4) to watch. Those last two episodes are the long-awaited "Return of Optimus Prime", where the producers responded to the massive backlash from the film by bringing back the most beloved of all Saturday morning heroes. (Indeed, so massive was the controversy that when the film was released in the UK they felt the need to add an epilogue in which that very return was promised! And they call this the Snowflake generation!)

But there's a big problem with the return of Optimus Prime - it's a really bad thing.

"Transformers: the Movie" is little more than yet another retelling of the Hero's Journey - Hot Rod starts as the brash young hope, gradually learns maturity and leadership, and eventually fulfils his destiny to release the power of the Matrix. (Incidentally, it's also something of a retelling of the end of the Exodus - Optimus Prime is Moses, the leader who is allowed to see, but not to enter, the Promised Land, Ultra Magnus is Joshua the warrior, and Hot Rod is David the promised king. Oh, and Unicron is Goliath. But I digress.) And the Hero's Journey is essentially the story of the transition to adulthood - the boy becomes the man.

One of the big themes of the third series of Transformers is Rodimus Prime's (Hot Rod's) struggle to live up to the legacy of Optimus Prime. He's constantly doubting himself, and needs reassured that he's doing a good job. Indeed, in two episodes ("Dark Awakening" and "The Burden Hardest to Bear") gives up leadership for one reason or another. But in both cases he eventually learns his lesson, resumes the mantle, and grows as a result.

Now, Rodimus Prime frankly isn't a patch on Optimus, partly because nobody could be, and partly because the character is really quite lame - right from the name ('Rodimus' comes from mashing up 'Hot Rod' and 'Optimus'); the fact that the toy is less good than Optimus, Ultra Magnus, or even Hot Rod; and that self-doubt makes for difficult storytelling. And yet, that character arc is actually one of the strongest parts of the otherwise very poor series 3 - having to overcome doubt and learn that you don't have to live up to an illustrious predecessor is a surprisingly mature theme for a children's TV show.

The problem with the return of Optimus Prime is that it necessarily reverses all that, and negates everything that has gone before. Rodimus is forces to give up the Matrix, and leadership. He reverts to the brash young hope that is Hot Rod. He ceases to be the adult he has become, and instead returns to being a child. Which, as life lessons go, just sucks.

The death of Optimus Prime is one of those things that I'm sure the makers of the series really wish they hadn't done, but it's also one of the biggest strengths of the movie, and one of the reasons that it still holds up where so much else from that time just falls by the wayside. And replacing Optimus with Rodimus was always going to be a really hard sell. But, from a storytelling perspective, it is really better to live with it and move on, rather than just negate the whole thing and pretend it never happened.

None of the Above

In light of the recent events in Catalonia, and especially the EU's silence on the matter (especially of elected politicians being jailed pre-trial by the Spanish authorities), I find I can no longer support the EU or our continued membership in it.

Unfortunately, I'm also in a position where I can't support the decision to leave, won as it was through outright lies (see: the bus), and fuelled by a mix of nostalgia for a golden age that never was (and an Empire that the world is better off without) and an unpleasant amount of xenophobia. (I should note: voting Leave doesn't make a person a racist, but unfortunately it does put you on the same side.)

Which means I now find myself in a position where, given a binary choice, my answer is "none of the above".

(Realistically, I would still vote to Remain, but it is despite the EU rather than because of it. Having seen the damage that leaving has caused already, and knowing that what's coming is going to be much worse, it's a no-brainer. But it's not a matter of self-interest, rather than of principle. Which is a lousy position to be in.)

Fake News

The BBC Scotland website currently has an article, "Irn Bru sales go up after new recipe introduced", indicating that Barrs have just had their best-ever year of sales.

Specifically, the sales numbers referred to are those up to the 27th of January this year (see the twelfth paragraph). The problem with that being that the recipe change occurred in late January of this year - indeed, I purchased at least some original Irn Bru even in February of this year.

So, in fact, this is a story about Irn Bru sales going up before the new recipe was introduced.

Ultimately, this is a story that doesn't really matter - Barrs will no doubt be looking at the up-to-date sales figures and will make a decision based on the reality and not the friendly spin the media has chosen to give them.

But it raises (again) a question: if they're willing to lie to you about this, what else are they willing to lie to you about? (Well... I suppose it's possible that this is just gross incompetence on the person who wrote the headline. I'm not sure that's really any better.)

Another Cause for Celebration

Today I received confirmation that I'm getting a promotion at work. Which is good - it's something that has been on the cards for quite some time, and that I've been working very hard to secure.

Later, there may be cake. Or ice cream. Or both.

A Poor Substitute

It looks like my plan to switch from Irn Bru to Coke (or Pepsi) is a non-starter. Over the past several weeks we've been drinking fairly copious amounts of the stuff, largely because we've needed the sugar hit to counteract the extreme lack of sleep.

Unfortunately, the main effect of this has been to leave me twitchy and strung out, with a side order of not being able to sleep at night (though, of course, I could readily sleep during the day, when I ideally want to be awake...).

(I should also note: at one point, my go-to replacement would have been 7-up, that being another of the four drinks that didn't use artificial sweeteners. Alas, during the Christmas break I noticed that it, too, had changed over. Disturbingly, that change was made without any notice, which is rather concerning when you consider that a small number of people react to these things much more strongly than I do. Anyway, the net effect is that my choices are now Coke, Pepsi, or nothing.)

So it's no good. Once my stockpile of Irn Bru runs out, and unless Barrs come to their senses and bring back the original formula (which I'm losing hope of), I guess I really will have to just learn to go completely without.

(And, worryingly, I notice that some diluting juices (Ribena) are now also making use of artificial sweeteners. At this rate, I'll be down to water and nothing else.)

Two Thoughts About Russia

When considering the situation with Russia, I'm struck by two thoughts that I just can't get past:

Firstly, the case against Russia seems to be almost exactly as strong as the case against Saddam Hussein was prior to the Iraq War in 2003. Unfortunately, I'm also well aware of how that turned out.

Secondly, I find myself trying to think of anything our current government has done well and in the interest of the people of the UK. And I'm coming up with nothing - this is the most shockingly incompetent government in my lifetime, up against some very stiff competition. And, in particular, their handling of foreign affairs has oscillated between tragedy and farce.

Given those two, I can't help but be extremely worried by our current course of action. While I agree that Russia is the most likely culprit for recent events, and while I agree that if this is proven we'll need to take action, I'm deeply concerned that we seem to be rushing to judgement in order to appear strong. I very much hope we're not rapidly heading for another tragedy.

Back To Work

I've now finished up my Paternity Leave (and vacation) and so returned to work this morning. It's been pretty heard going so far! The morning was more or less okay, since I'm traditionally a morning person but, as anticipated, once we got into the afternoon I started the flag. And it didn't help that the various catch-up jobs I had to do, which were time-consuming but low-thought, have now almost run out. At some point, I'm going to have to actually think, which isn't so good...

Sleepy...

Pink

Funsize and I had a fairly important discussion the other night. Well, mostly I talked, and she rolled her eyes. Anyway, the reason for our conversation was that I was busy changing her into a bright pink sleep-suit, and it concerned the colour pink.

Ever since FS arrives and proved to be a girl, we have been given huge numbers of clothes for her to wear, for which we are very grateful. And I've been fairly stunned - I hadn't realised there was so much pink stuff in all the world - sleepsuits, dresses, tights, leggings, socks... This has caused some slight unease for me, and perhaps rather greater unease for LC - we're conscious of the dangers of pigeon-holing FS as a girly-girl, as "Daddy's Little Princess", or whatever else. On the other hand, we've received so many clothes that there's basically no need to buy FS anything else for some months, and it would of course be churlish and rude simply to dismiss those gifts.

And so, the need for the conversation. During which I pointed out to FS firstly that pink is a perfectly acceptable colour, and should not be considered in any way inferior. Equally, however, I pointed out that FS would be entirely free to determine her path - if she wants to play with dinosaurs and monsters, and pirates and robots then that's fine... as indeed if she wishes to play with princesses and dolls. And if she chooses to mix-and-match, then that will be just fine too. Really, it's up to her.

And as for her clothes... I expect there will be plenty of pink in her future. Hopefully, there will also be a whole rainbow of other colours as well.

#11: "Pathfinder: Beyond the Veiled Past", by Thurston Hillman
#12: "Ready Player One", by Ernest Cline
#13: "The Black Elfstone", by Terry Brooks

Life Lessons for my Daughter

One of the great joys of parenthood (rather more pleasant than changing all those nappies - about a million so far), is the opportunity to pass on all of my great wisdom. Or, failing that, some stuff that sounds good that I've probably nicked from a book somewhere.

Funsize is now ten days old, and in that time we have passed on three great nuggets of wisdom...

1. If you're frustrated, you won't get it. This one was from LC, and was in response to a feeding mishap - FS was struggling to find food and was getting annoyed and thrashing about. This, of course, was counter-productive, hence the life lesson.
2. You've got to plan ahead. This one came this morning. I was in the shower and FS woke up demanding to be changed right now. That was fine, since LC was on hand to do the necessary. However, FS then decided it would be highly amusing to poo everywhere - her sleep suit, the changing mat, the carpet, LC... everywhere. Anyway, this was all fine, except that LC then proceeded to take her own shower immediately thereafter in order to clean the mess, leaving me with FS. And then FS realised that she was also hungry, with no choice but to wait. If, instead, she had planned ahead, she could have waited for me to get out the shower, and then I could have been the recipient of the amusing poo, leaving LC free to feed her. A classic blunder.
3. Never start a land war in Asia. This is a bit of a niche lesson, but important to learn - it's the most famous of the classic blunders, after all.

As you can see, it has been an education, for both of us. (We've also been educating FS in all the cultural cornerstones - thus far being "The Hobbit" and "Transformers"...)

#10: "Only Dead on the Inside", by James Breakwell (an early candidate for book of the year)

A Little Blog House-keeping

I've decided that the time has come to retire the old "happy?" tag for blog posts, and have instead replaced it with the more definitive "happy" tag.

That is all.

Snow Day! Oh... wait...

As a consequence of the bad weather, my work closed the office yesterday afternoon and sent everyone home. Which is as it should be: nothing that we do is truly essential, so far better to get everyone to safety and take pressure off the roads and other support services. (And while we're encouraged to take work home with us as possible, if circumstances don't allow for it then so be it.)

Of course, this all falls into the period while I'm on paternity leave anyway, so it makes little difference to me. Though I did have to walk two miles to Asda today to avert a toilet paper shortage. Which wasn't too bad, but considerably more tiring than that would normally be.

#9: "Feersum Endjinn", by Iain M. Banks

LC Labours Long (and succeeds!)

Firstly, and most importantly, I have a daughter! Project Tadpole came to a successful end on Wednesday morning, and so she shall no longer be referred to as Tadpole - she has a real name, and also a blog name that I shall introduce later.

It was all a bit of a nervy time. LC had been due on the 9th of this month, but that came and went without incident. And when she went to see the midwife last week, it didn't go well - an attempted sweep was just too uncomfortable to complete.

So I had my last day of work on Monday, and then we were booked in for an induction on Tuesday morning. The first phase of which is the installation of some sort of hormonal pill, after which we went home.

Tuesday was a fairly uncomfortable day - LC was complaining about back pain all day, which seemed to get worse as the day went on. Which was pretty horrible. About 11 we went to bed, though it was unlikely we'd get more sleep. And that plan was to go to the hospital again the next morning for the second phase of induction, and a long wait in the hospital.

In the event, it was unnecessary - LC's waters broke just before midnight, we called the Labour ward, and off we went!

Five minutes later, we were at the hospital. We did make a mistake in going to the wrong ward initially, but were soon at the Labour ward, gained admission, and waiting for a room to be ready for us.

The theme of the next several hours was of waiting. LC did a lot of work - I tried to do what I could, but the reality is that that was very little. The midwife was great, but really it was LC who was magnificent. She didn't even use much pain relief - she took a paracetamol and some codeine early on, and then some gas and air for an hour from 1.30 (but then stopped because she was feeling nauseous), but that was all.

Things actually proceeded really fast, and just after 4 it was time to push. Alas, that was the end of the 'easy' bit. An hour later, and it was time for a doctor to be consulted.

The upshot was that our baby needed a bit of help to reach the world. There was also some concern that she might be facing the wrong way, which wasn't good - but the doctor couldn't be sure, as the examination was just too painful to perform. So the recommendation was for LC to have an anaesthetic, and then the examination would be possible. From there, a forceps delivery might hopefully be possible... if not, a C-Section might be needed.

Well... this was the point where I got really worried, because while I'm aware that these things are fairly routine these days and the risks are pretty minor, the fact is that the risks are non-zero. And even if the odds are 10,000-to-1, someone still has to be that one. And when you're talking about the two most important people in my life, that's a hell of a thing.

But, of course, saying any of that really isn't helpful. The key thing was that LC had done as much as she could possibly have done, and it was time to let them help her out. And then pray.

In the event, it all went as easily as could be hoped - as soon as the anaesthetic was applied, LC found she was no longer in pain (as you'd expect, really), which was a huge relief, it turned out that baby was the right way around, and so although forceps were needed a C-Section was not. And both came through okay.

Project Tadpole came to a successful end at 6.20am on Wednesday 21st Feb 2018. She weighed in at 9 pounds 15 ounces (and a bit).

As she was born, I had the great pleasure of informing LC of the sex of our child. That was quite a thing, because although we genuinely didn't know until that moment, we'd more or less convinced ourselves that we were having a girl. Not that it matters, of course - her first clothes (from us) were still an R2-D2 onesie, and she's still been watching Transformers with her Daddy. She's my little girl, but she's still my little geek. Until she rebels and grows up secretly normal.

The rest of the story is pretty straightforward - LC and baby were kept in for the rest of the day for observation, and then we came home on Thursday. We've since been having very little sleep, we've been enjoying a multitude of visitors, and have been very much imposing on Gran's willingness to do the ironing. And the nappies have been horrific.

Now, I said she now has a real name, which I'm not going to reveal here. However, she also now has a blog name, which is rather important. As you know (maybe), LC is short for Lady Chocolat. I therefore toyed with calling her Little Chocolat, since she is very much her mother's daughter, albeit much smaller in stature (for now). However, that would need to be abbreviated to lc, and that would just be confusing. Therefore, I shall name her after another form of little chocolate: Funsize (FS for short). Until someone in the comments points out that that's a really bad idea...

And now... sleepy. So very, very tired.

Oh yes, one more thing: we need to say a huge thank you to the staff at the hospital. You were fantastic from start to finish.

#8: "The Sorcerer's Daughter", by Terry Brooks

If Now Is Not The Time, This Is...

As a matter of principle, I take the view that the question of gun control in the US is a matter for citizens of the US. It's not really my business.

But...

Every time there is a mass shooting in the US (about three times a week), the response is on the one hand to send thoughts and prayers, and on the other hand to declare that this isn't the time to discuss gun control. And then the media cycle moves on, and somehow "the time" never quite seems to come around. And then it happens again, and all the same things get said... and the big discussion never quite happens.

Some of the survivors of the Florida shooting have now called for an end to this cycle. They've accepted that now isn't the time... but they've also set a date. Good for them.

Here's the video:

Survivors of the school shooting in Florida are calling for a march on Washington to demand action on gun control. "People are saying that it’s not time to talk about gun control, and we can respect that. Here’s a time: March 24, in every single city." https://t.co/ObmdZo67La pic.twitter.com/qaJfAZy99k

— ABC News (@ABC) 18 February 2018

Day 50: Update on... Stuff

Normally at this point in the year I would put together an update on my goals for the year. However, having only one goal fixed makes that somewhat pointless, so instead here's a more general update on various things:

Books: Normally, by day 50 I would be targetting just over 8.2 books read. As of last night, I have read 7 books exactly in 2018. It would be more, but "Against a Dark Background" really slowed me down. (Funnily enough, it was an Iain Banks novel that also nearly derailed me last year.)

Anyway, that's no big deal, since I didn't set that goal for this year. Instead, my target was to get through the remaining books on the British side of The List. And on that front I have read 2 of the entries, leaving a further 9 (or 8, given that "Hamlet" is a duplicate). So, in theory at least, I'm right on target. That said, the two I've read are probably the shortest two of the options, so it gets harder from here...

Band: It has been a bit weird going through the winter without practicing heavily for a competition season. That said, joining the new band has motivated me enough to keep practicing, which is good. And it has been going well, though it has been a little disconcerting that I've now twice found myself left in charge of the practices. Which wasn't quite what I'd intended...

Gaming: Just as I was taking part in my final Pathfinder game, a new game kicked off at work, which has been interesting. The format is quite limiting, with us only having one hour to play per week, but it's better than nothing.

Weight: As noted elsewhere, I have been attending the gym twice a week since starting back at work, which has been tough. I have also lost about half a stone, which normally would be great... except that that mostly puts me back where I was at the start of last year. And since getting back to that point it has stalled. Grr.

Blogging: I've been finding it rather difficult to find good topics for the blog, and as a consequence I haven't maintained the post rate I would prefer - the Imaginarium is not far from my target, but one has fallen quite short. Must do better!

And leaving the most important until last...

Project Tadpole: Still waiting. Otherwise, you would have heard about it by now!

And that's basically that. See you in seven weeks!

#7: "Lolita", by Vladimir Nabokov (a book from The List. Also, ick.)

Black Panther

LC and I went out to see the latest Marvel film last night. And it's good.

The recent Marvel films have tended to go one of two ways - either they take a very offbeat tack (Guardians 2, Thor 3), or they tell a fairly straightforward story in an unusual way (Dr Strange). "Black Panther" falls into the latter category - at its heart is a story of family drama, set in a fictional African kindgom where natural resources have given them super-tech.

And Wakanda is pretty cool, but where the film really shines is in the cast - Chadwick Boseman had a key part to play in the success of "Civil War" (providing the emotional heart of that film while Cap and Tony are busy tearing each other apart), and he's great here too. I would say he carries this film, but that would be unfair on the others.

Opposite Boseman, we have Michael B. Jordan playing another grieving son. He was great in "Creed" (itself far better than it has any right to be), and he's good here, filling the character with a great deal of menace and danger, and yet still not being entirely one-dimensional.

(Edit: When I wrote this post I hadn't yet realised that Ryan Coogler was the director of both "Creed" and "Black Panther", which explains a great deal. That's a name I'll have to look out for in future.)

And then there are the women: the bodyguard, the spy, and the scientist (Dania Gurira, Lupita Nyong'o, and Letitia Wright, respectively). Very varied roles, very varied characters, and all great. Plus Angela Bassett and Forest Whitaker in small but significant roles.

(Even Martin Freeman did well. I really didn't like his character in CW, but they did a good job of turning him around here. He's not a good guy, as such, and he's not a bad guy either. He's somewhere in the middle, which is cool.)

Looking past the cast, there's the set design which is new and unique (at least in the MCU), and the sound, which again isn't quite like anything else in Marvel films to date. Good stuff.

I do have two slight quibbles. The first is that, again, we have the big CGI battle to end the film - the trappings are different, but it's still just pretty cartoons going against one another. Unfortunately, I'm not really sure how you get around this - they did a pretty good job of setting up the competing agendas that led to the big fight (again, as in CW), but once you get there it's still a lot of sound and fury.

The other was that at times I found the fight scenes hard to follow - the camera seemed to do a twisty-zoomy motion that gave things a somewhat dreamlike feel, but also made it hard to keep track. It wasn't as bad as "Transformers", probably because nothing is, but it was still far from ideal... especially when there were a lot of characters wearing very similar uniforms running around.

But those are quibbles - the strengths of this film are very strong. Chalk up another winner for Marvel.

Waiting

There's not much going on in our world right now - we're mostly just waiting for Tadpole to make an appearance. We may or may not get a chance to see "Black Panther" before this happens. (I'd kind of hope not, but it's not up to me.)

It's funny how much harder it is to wait for things when you don't know how long you'll be waiting. After the fiasco with the sale of the flat, you'd think I'd be used to it by now. Oh well.

In the meantime, the latest books:

#5: "Pathfinder: Tower of the Drowned Dead", by Ron Lundeen
#6: "Against a Dark Background", by Iain M. Banks

Hmm, that's odd

I find myself lined up to pipe at a wedding in June of this year in the USA. As a consequence of this, I thought it would be quite nice to play something suitable American for the event, and while the "Star Spangled Banner" doesn't work terribly well on the pipes (due to the range of notes available), "America the Beautiful" should indeed work.

Or so I thought.

The thing is, while I've found sheet music for the tune easily enough, and although that music seems to match up with the way I'd expect the tune to be played, all the videos I've found of people playing the tune are at odds with this - there's a High-A being played where the sheet music shows a High-G. And as a consequence it all sounds really weird, and obviously wrong.

I suppose it's possible that Sinatra just sang it wrong, and that the tune should indeed have that High-A. But that really doesn't feel right, given how obviously wrong that High-A sounds in that context.

I dunno. It's just odd.

Anyway, the upshot is that I'm going to learn it the way that the music says, and if anyone questions it I'll just blame Frank.

Experimental Cookery 2018: Chicken Noodle Stir-fry

This one also comes from Jamie's "5 Ingredients" book, which I strongly suspect will be the more-used of the two cookbooks I got for Christmas, but which hasn't had quite the impact I thought it might. I had to replace the brocolli in the recipe with green pepper (as I can't eat brocolli), and I also added some spring onion as a garnish because I figured why not...

The meal was, as anticipated, very quick and easy to put together. I think it took about 20 minutes from end to end, which is pretty good for a week-night (the book claims 16, but I don't entirely trust the cooking time for the chicken, and I did include time for washing and chopping the veg before I applied heat to anything).

The result was mostly fine, but way too salty. I suspect that's a matter of having too much black bean sauce in the mix. However, I'm not particularly inspired to have this again too soon - it was fine, but I have a number of other chicken/noodle dishes in my repertoire already, and this doesn't do anything to displace them.

Still, a worthy effort for the second of the year.

Washing Machine Down

Our washing machine died yesterday. It looks pretty serious - my guess is that it's the main board that has given up the ghost, which is theoretically fixable but probably not worth it. However, this isn't a disaster, as we already have a new washing machine, which we bought for the flat a couple of years ago. So, really, all that's needed is to take out the old washing machine, put the new one in its place, plug it in...

Unfortunately, that's where the next problem comes in, because the washing machine and tumble drier in our utility room aren't plugged in to the wall at all - some bright spark decided the thing to do was to wire them in directly. (I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but I can't find the offending post...) So what is needed is a multi-step process - first, pull the appliances away from the wall; switch off the power in the house; unwire the existing appliances; wire in a new socket; switch the power back on; lift the old washing machine into the garage and bring the new one into the house; plug the new one in. (And much the same for the tumble drier.)

And, alas, the washing machine, at least, is too heavy for one person to lift by themselves.

So it's all a bit of a nuisance, especially since we're in a position where we can't easily make plans, and where I don't get home until after it gets dark. And, of course, it's now a job that can't really wait - we can just about make do without a washing machine for a short period, but it's really not for the best.

A Tiny Victory

On Sundays at the moment, Channel 4 have a show "The Biggest Little Railway in the World" which, really is one of those shows that exists because they have holes in the schedule so they find some colourful characters, set them an absurd challenge, package it all up with some historical context, and call it good. Anyway, it's a relaxing way to waste some much-needed time, so that's fine.

Anyway... (Oh, and spoilers, I guess...)

LC and I have been watching the show since about mid-way through the first episode, and it's been interesting. I'm particularly enjoying the engineering challenges. It's all a bit odd, but it's good fun.

However, last night's episode was filled with the tragic moment when the team lead decided that the Age of Steam would have to come to an end - they were taking too long servicing the steam locomotive, so that they weren't going to meet their target. So he replaced the steam locomotive with a battery-powered one that, while obviously more efficient, just wasn't as good. New is not always better.

Anyway, that was the way of things for about a quarter of the show - they'd shifted from steam to electric, it had all gone modern, and that was that.

But then, triumphantly, they brought back the steam engine! This seemed mostly to be due to stubbornness - the team lead had to go check in on another team, so the lead engineer (who was then in charge) brought back the steam locomotive because, let's face it, it's just better. (Seriously, that seemed to be the argument - we like steam, so let's have it. Huzzah!)

But what's most interesting, and the reason that I'm bothering with this post, is that Tadpole seems to particularly enjoy this show (it's probably the music). And at the exact moment when the steam locomotive was restored, Tadpole chose to dance the Dance of Celebration!

Thus proving two things: Tadpole is a person of taste and discretion, because steam is indeed better, and Tadpole is clearly going to be an engineer when she grows up. Huzzah again!

Unless she decides to do something else instead, of course.

(Also, the pronouns aren't a clue, because I don't know. I may need to edit this post in a couple of weeks to change them.)

The Day of Sorrows is Upon Me

For the past several weeks, the Tesco list has had "Irn Bru?" on it, as a consequence of the impending change to the ingredients. Until this week, a check of the bottles has revealed that we were still on old stock, and so I've gradually built up a supply (as each week I have bought enough for two weeks).

Yesterday, reading the bottle revealed the horrible truth that we were now on the new stuff. So that had to go back on the shelf while I completed my shop in dismay. (In the end, the story had a happy ending - it turned out that while the bottles were new, they still had cans that were in the old recipe. Score one more for the good guys!)

Which means that we've come to the crunch time. Things can go one of three ways: either the sales figures will hold up (or even improve), and the new recipe will be here to stay; or they'll drop by a reasonable amount, but not enough to force a rethink, and the new recipe will be here to stay; or sales will plummet and they'll fairly quickly have to reverse the decision (as happened with New Coke). I hate hoping for something to fail, but...

On the larger topic, I do understand why this measure has come about. The impending Sugar Tax left Barrs in a tricky spot. They had three choices: they could swallow the tax themselves, and devastate their profits; or they could pass on the tax to customers, and see a large hit in sales; or they could do what they have done.

What they couldn't do, unfortunately, is just reduce the sugar content without adding other sweeteners. The Sugar Tax is a binary thing - you pay nothing up to a threshold, and then you pay the full amount no matter how far above it you are. Irn Bru was at about double the threshold. So a reasonably reduction in sugar wouldn't be enough to avoid the tax, while cutting it by half would drastically alter the flavour (probably making it undrinkable). So, to avoid the tax, it had to be artificial sweeteners.

(They could, of course, have launched either "Irn Bru 50/50" as a new option, or introduced "Irn Bru Premium" that maintained the sugar but at a higher price. But there are problems with both options - basically, you're competing against yourself, which never ends well.)

So, that's where we are. I believe I have enough in stock to take me through to my birthday (especially since I'm still giving it up for Lent, starting on the 13th of February). By which time we'll know the outcome one way or another - either the new stuff will be here to stay, or the old recipe will be back. Or, just possibly, that "Irn Bru Premium" I mentioned may have arrived... though I'd be surprised.

#4: "The Darkling Child", by Terry Brooks

Gym and Bear It

Ever since work moved to our current office about 5 years ago, I have been a member of the university gym. It's actually a very well-stocked gym (except for the lack of a swimming pool), and at a very reasonable price - and, indeed, it's even more reasonable since I'm technically classed as university staff (for book-keeping reasons) and so get a lower rate, and work subsidise the membership.

That said, any price is still too much if you don't actually use it, and despite the occasional visit over the years, and despite a brief flurry a few years ago, I haven't really had my money's worth. Indeed, about two years ago they built a whole new facility, and in all that time I'd only actually been back once - and that was for lunch!

Late last year, a couple of months after moving house, I received some spam-mail from the gym. This was sent to my home address, was duly redirected in the post, and so reminded me that I needed to update the gym with my new home address. Then, on the morning when I was about to head over there to do that, I received an email from them, noting that I hadn't been in a while and inviting me to come along for an induction session.

That conveniently all tied up as a big reminded that maybe I should think about going.

And so, the big development of 2018 so far (albeit one that is soon to be eclipsed) is that I've actually been going to the gym regularly.

It's worth noting that this isn't a New Year's Resolution, largely because I don't do those, but also because this all started up in the last working week of December. Indeed, I even went over to the gym on Tuesday the 27th, though that proved to be a mistake (since it was crazy busy).

I'm still not convinced that it's doing me more good than it's causing me pain, but never mind. The big challenge, though, will be to resume going after the arrival of Tadpole - that last flurry of visits I mentioned stopped as soon as I had my first holiday of that year, so taking a break is known to be dangerous...

#3: "On the Road", by Jack Kerouac (a book from The List)

Experimental Cookery 2018: Lemony Courgette Linguine

For Christmas I received two cookbooks, and the first Experimental Cookery of the year came from one of these, Jamie's "5 Ingredients" book. This was one I'd seen on his programme and wanted to try, so...

Well, as expected the meal was quick and easy to put together, with the most involved step being to slice up the courgettes. Not exactly tough. So, it was all done and on the plate inside 25 minutes - I could have done it faster if I'd chopped those at the same time I cooked the pasta.

Taste wise... it was okay, but I'm afraid no more than that. Certainly, I'm not inspired to do this one again. A shame, but not a disaster.

And that's that. I don't have a next Experimental Cookery planned, but one will no doubt come up...

#2: "Pathfinder: City in the Deep", by Amber E. Scott

Theresa's Reshuffle

One for the media: if you don't mind, I'd rather you didn't endlessly harp on about the Tories being inept on social media, and instead bring us the news of what's actually happening. Indeed, a nice table showing all the jobs as they get filled in would be just right.

The thing is, while it's amusing that the Tories are having a bad time of it on Twitter, that's really not important in the grand scheme. It is, after all, really easy to hit "Send" before you realise you've got the wrong name in place, or to drop in a spelling mistake. Yes, it's funny. But it's no more than that.

More important, though, and what I'd like to know, is who is going to be ruining the country for the next year or so.

And that's not a typo.

#1: "The Legend of Sigurd and Gudrún", by J.R.R. Tolkien

Books of the Year 2017

As part of the end-of-year round-up, here's the list of the books of 2017:

1. "Pathfinder: The Whisper Out of Time", by Richard Pett
2. "Reaper's Eye", by Richard A. Knaak
3. "Far From the Madding Crowd", by Thomas Hardy *
4. "Jarka Ruus", by Terry Brooks
5. "The Player of Games", by Iain M. Banks
6. "Ravenspur", by Conn Iggulden
7. "Pathfinder: What Grows Within", by John Compton
8. "Jude the Obscure", by Thomas Hardy *
9. "Tanequil", by Terry Brooks
10. "Use of Weapons", by Iain M. Banks
11. "Pathfinder: Black Stars Beckon", by Jim Groves
12. "Through the Gate in the Sea", by Howard Andrew Jones
13. "The Remains of the Day", by Kazuo Ishiguro *
14. "State of the Art", by Iain M. Banks
15. "Straken", by Terry Brooks
16. "The Immortal Throne", by Stella Gemmell
17. "The Color Purple", by Alice Walker *
18. "Armageddon's Children", by Terry Brooks
19. "Pathfinder: Trail of the Hunted", by Amber E. Scott
20. "Excession", by Iain M. Banks
21. "Pathfinder: Fangs of War", by Rob Lundeen
22. "The Woman in White", by Wilkie Collins *
23. "Gears of Faith", by Gabrielle Harbowy
24. "The Elves of Cintra", by Terry Brooks
25. "Inversions", by Iain M. Banks
26. "Pathfinder: Assault on Longshadow", by Benjamin Bruck and Thurston Hillman
27. "The Flame Bearer", by Bernard Cornwell
28. "The Gypsy Morph", by Terry Brooks
29. "Look to Windward", by Iain M. Banks
30. "She's Come Undone", by Wally Lamb *
31. "Pathfinder: Siege of Stone", by Thurston Hillman
32. "The Long Cosmos", by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter
33. "Madame Bovary", by Gustave Flaubert *
34. "Bearers of the Black Staff", by Terry Brooks
35. "Pathfinder: Prisoners of the Blight", by Amanda Hamon Kunz
36. "The Witch's Vacuum Cleaner", by Terry Pratchett
37. "Matter", by Iain M. Banks
38. "The Power", by Naomi Alderman
39. "The Secret Garden", by Frances Hodgson Burnett *
40. "Measure of the Magic", by Terry Brooks
41. "Pathfinder: Vault of the Onyx Citadel", by Larry Wilhelm
42. "Go Set a Watchman", by Harper Lee
43. "Surface Detail", by Iain M. Banks
44. "Anne of Green Gables", by L. M. Montgomery *
45. "Pathfinder: The Lost Outpost", by Jim Groves
46. "A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms", by George R.R. Martin
47. "The View From the Cheap Seats", by Neil Gaiman
48. "Wards of Faerie", by Terry Brooks
49. "Germinal", by Émile Zola *
50. "Pathfinder: Into the Shattered Continent", by Robert Brookes
51. "Bloodfire Quest", by Terry Brooks
52. "Beren and Luthien", by J.R.R. Tolkien
53. "Witch Wraith", by Terry Brooks
54. "Pathfinder: The Flooded Cathedral", by Mikko Kallio
55. "SS-GB", by Len Deighton
56. "Xanathar's Guide to Everything", by Wizards of the Coast
57. "The High Druid's Blade", by Terry Brooks
58. "Swallows and Amazons", by Arthur Ransome *
59. "Moby Dick", by Herman Melville *
60. "The Hydrogen Sonata", by Iain M. Banks

So, that's 60 books exactly, including twelve from The List. Of these, there are thirteen RPG books, and only one re-read ("Use of Weapons"). The Pathfinder Tales sublist had to be curtailed, as these suddenly stopped being published (with still no news of them restarting), but the other sublists were completed, and sufficient additional new books were added to make up the total. So I'm happy with that.

The book of the year was, surprisingly, the very last one I read: "The Hydrogen Sonata" by Iain M. Banks, which was the best of a strong series, and a very fine way to send off that series. I should note that, until book 60, the previous best had been "Inversions" by the same author. Also of note is "Germinal" by Zola, which was strong stuff but very depressing.

The most disappointing book of the year was itself a disappointing category, as three books were in very strong contention for the position, meaning that the quality of the year as a whole took a hit. "The Power" was abject nonsense, but it was at least well-written and mostly entertaining nonsense, so it's spared the title. "Go Set a Watchman" was likewise a huge disappointment, and indeed a book I wish I had never been published as it achieves the almost impossible and makes "To Kill a Mockingbird" retroactively less good. But I was aware of the risk going in, so I have to blame myself, at least in part, for that one.

The book that gets the title, sadly, is "Beren and Luthien", which I didn't enjoy and which also disappointed my high hopes for it. I'd expected, and hoped for, something on the lines of the excellent "Children of Hurin", and although I was uncertain how this could be done (since as far as I was aware, Tolkien never finished a long-form version of this story), I'd hoped that something had come to light to allow it. Alas, this was not the case - "Beren and Luthien" reads much more like an academic tract, bringing together and discussion lots of different versions of the story, without actually presenting the whole thing as a cohesive narrative. It's a book about a story, not really the story itself. (Which is a shame, since that and the story of the Fall of Gondolin, would be extremely interesting additions to the canon of Middle Earth, if it were possible for them to be brought together.)

2018 is another year of transition, and like 2012 I'm therefore not setting goals of the same sort. In fact, the one goal that I am setting is a reading goal, but it's not a total number of books but rather more specific: I intend to read ten specific titles over the course of the year. I've discussed the specifics of this on my post about goals, so won't reiterate them here.

My Year in 2017

So, the end of 2017. It's been an interesting year, if nothing else! After flirting with the possibility of a change, in the end I decided to stick with my normal format...

My Year in... Blogging

This year I set myself a sort-of goal of posting an average of 10 times a month on this blog, and a further five times a month on the Imaginarium - enough for both blogs to be vibrant, but not a record-beating number. And I've achieved both targets pretty much exactly. I'm happy with that.

My Year in... Work

There's not much I can say about work - all the same things I couldn't talk about last year are pretty much as un-talk-about-able as they were last year.

For the rest... in some ways this has been a great year, in others it has fallen short. There's the prospect of some of that being made good in the near future, but then I thought that this time last year (I even had a whole goal about it). So we'll have to see.

Once again, there has been no call to travel this year. Under the circumstances, my ability to travel next year is limited. So I don't know when next I'll be away.

My Year in... Health

This year has been much the same as the last few - mostly fine, with the IBS never really being too bad. I did have to have a root canal treatment on one tooth, which wasn't fun. But that's done now.

My Year in... Gaming

2017 has been a very quiet year for gaming - I enjoyed a grand total of five sessions, I think, one of which was "Star Trek" and the others "Pathfinder". My main conclusion is that Pathfinder is not for me.

I expect 2018 to be largely devoid of gaming.

My Year in... Band

2017 was a bittersweet year for band. I enjoyed my last season with Camelon & District (well, I mostly enjoyed it) and then bowed out. I've since joined Uphall Station Pipe Band, which is a local, non-competing band. The standard is much lower, which is inherent in 'non-competing', but the pressure is also much less. I've played two events with them so far, and it's a good fit.

My Year in... Resolutions

As always, the wrap-up of annual goals, and setting of goals for next year, are handled in another post.

My Year in... Travel

I made two trips in 2017, and LC made a third. During the Easter holiday, we took a short holiday in York, which was good fun. And then in October we visited Copenhagen. This latter trip was also good fun, with the highlight being seeing the polar bear (in the zoo), though it was really quite expensive (and, to be honest, I preferred Amsterdam).

I didn't take a summer holiday this year due to the house move, but LC spent a week in Croatia. Which is deeply unfair - maybe I'll take a holiday by myself next year to make up for it.

On the other hand, the big movement of the year was also a very short one - the move from Falkirk to Livingston. We finally moved out of the flat at the start of June, and into the new house at the start of July (while LC was in Croatia, no less). This was all a bit of a nightmare, so it was a huge relief to have it finally over and done with!

My Year in... Faith

Following the house move, LC and I have done a tour of the churches in and around Livingston, and settled on a new base of worship. It's very new at the moment, but looks to be a good start.

Other than that, there's not much to report.

My Year in... Sadness

Of course, the end-of-year review couldn't pass without mentioning the passing of Grandma, on the 1st of April. I wrote about this at some length at the time, so won't reiterate it here, but it's sad that this was the first Christmas in twenty years when she wasn't visiting (albeit in hospital last year).

My Year in... Great Joy

But, of course, the most significant event of the year was of course the start of Project Tadpole, which is now in the middle of its eighth month. This is actually something I've been hoping for for a very long time, and also something I'm very much looking forward to in 2018.

My Year... Overall

I know that a lot of people have found 2017 to be extremely trying, and there is certainly reason to wish it done. However, for me, 2017 was a very distinct step forward from the horrors of 2016. It was really good to finally complete the house move, developments at work have been largely positive (though not without their problems - but I can't talk about that), and so it has been a generally okay year.

2018 promises to be a year of major changes. That being the case, I'm not entirely sure what to expect. I guess we'll find out.

And with that, I bid farewell to blogging for 2017. I hope you have a good New Year, and that 2018 brings every blessing.

End of Year Update on Goals

With the year rapidly coming to an end, it's time for the end-of-year wrap-up. And so my first post on the topic is the update on my goals for the year:

• Weight: No joy. This has been an utter failure. There's not really any more to be said there - it just hasn't worked out at all.
• Books: This was a very narrow success - I finished book 60 on the 29th of the month. I made it through all but one of the sub-lists - I had to abandon the Pathfinder Tales when Paizo stopped publishing them, though that can't really be considered a failing in the goal. So, success!
• Super Secret Goal #4: This was completed, finally, in August.
• Part Five: The House: This was mostly done - we didn't get around to redecorating the two rooms, but we did get the various bits of new furniture and did do most of the other things on our list. So that's not bad.
• Part Five: Church: Done. LC and I have decided to worship at the St Andrew's church in Livingston (which is associated with the Old Parish), at least for the foreseeable future.
• Part Five: Band: Done. I left Camelon & District Pipe Band at the AGM, and have moved across to Uphall Station Pipe Band, a non-competing band in my local area. So that's good.
• Part Five: Gaming: Done. I've decided to stick with the Falkirk RPG group, at least nominally. However, I expect my gaming to be sharply curtailed over the next few years - indeed I'm considering stopping gaming altogether for various reasons.
• Super Secret Goal #5: I fairly quickly decided that this goal would be discarded. And yet, with the end of the year upon us, I find I may have to revisit it...

So...

Of the eight goals, that's five done and one abandoned. There was one incomplete task, and one abject failure. That's pretty good, really. But the failure of the weight goal is fairly damning.

2018 will very much be a year of transition, much like 2012. And, like 2012, 2018 will be marked with an absence of formal goals. In fact, I'm only going to set one, and it will be both fairly minor and awfully specific:

• Books: As I've mentioned before, The List is made up as a composite of two top-100 lists, one British and one American. My goal for the year is therefore to read the remaining titles in the British list. This gives me ten specific titles to read over the next year (technically eleven, but somehow "The Complete Works of Shakespeare" and "Hamlet" are both on the list. I'm not sure how that came about.)

And that really is it - just one goal for the year, and it's extremely doable. (I do hope, again, to do something about the weight issue, but I'm not setting a formal goal even on that front. I wonder if that means it will be any more effective.)

#57: "The High Druid's Blade", by Terry Brooks
#58: "Swallows and Amazons", by Arthur Ransome (a book from The List)
#59: "Moby Dick", by Herman Melville (a book from The List)
#60: "The Hydrogen Sonata", by Iain M. Banks

The Last Jedi

Well... it's a film.

I don't think there are any spoilers in what follows. But if you really want to be sure, look away now!

LC and I went to see the new Star Wars film last night. Surprisingly, the cinema was largely empty. I have no idea why this was the case - did they just put on too many showings, or massively over-estimate the draw of the film? Or is it just that the Vue are so absurdly expensive that they've killed their own business? (I suppose it might also be that 3D is now a dead fad, but I didn't see a huge number of people lining up for any of the other showings either...)

My impression of the film itself was... strange. There are several things that I liked - I liked that they did something new with the film, rather than just rehash "The Empire Strikes Back", and I liked some of the new characters and new locations, I liked seeing the 1% of the galaxy, and I liked the various takes on Luke and Kylo's memory...

In addition, there's nothing I didn't like about the film. Okay, maybe one particular bit of silliness, but can live with that (it is only a few moments, after all). And, I suppose one moment left me thinking "why didn't you do that in the first place?" But those are quibbles, rather than movie-shattering flaws.

But having said that, my overall impression is, as I said above: "it's a film." I didn't hate it, I didn't love it... it was just there. Okay then, thanks for that, see you next year.

Which is weird.

I should note: I do think it's better than "The Force Awakens", but probably not as good as "Rogue One" (on any count). And it's not going to dislodge any of the original trilogy from my affections. It's also better than "Justice League" or "Wonder Woman", but I certainly enjoyed "Thor: Ragnarok" considerably more.

One More!

I forgot to post at the time, but when in Edinburgh Airport on my way to Copenhagen I discovered a truly great piece of news: there is one more Terry Pratchett book that I have not read! It's a third short story collection, "Father Christmas' Fake Beard", collecting a few more of his early writings. That, alas, really will be the end, but never mind - it's one more bit of extra time I didn't know was coming.

#54: "Pathfinder: The Flooded Cathedral", by Mikko Kallio
#55: "SS-GB", by Len Deighton
#56: "Xanathar's Guide to Everything", by Wizards of the Coast

Ending in Fire

I'm a little hesitant to write this post. It has been my contention for some time that anyone who interprets politics through the lens of Harry Potter is equivalent to Dolores Umbridge teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts: lacking a proper understanding of the subject, they're forced to revert back to an inadequate textbook.

And yet, I'm about the note a big parallel between UK politics and "Babylon 5". But, oh well.

So, here it is: in B5, the Centauri Republic most readily match up to the UK - a proud, decadent people, that are somehow both a democracy and ruled by an emperor, long since past their prime, and busily sucking up to the Earth Alliance (that is: America).

In this arrangement, Nigel Farage is Londo Mollari, and especially in his answer to the famous "What do you want?" question: "Do you really want to know what I want? Do you really want to know the truth? I want my people to reclaim their rightful place in the galaxy. I want to see the Centauri stretch forth their hand again and command the stars. I want a rebirth of glory, a renaissance of power! I want to stop running through my life like a man late for an appointment, afraid to look back or look forward. I want us to be what we used to be! I want... I want it all back the way it was. Does that answer your question?"

(There's a really big weakness of the analogy right here - in the show Londo is deeply flawed, but he's actually a sympathetic, albeit tragic, figure.)

Of course, things don't go well for our hero. But I'll get to that.

As the show progresses, the various species eventually find common ground in the Interstellar Alliance, of which the Centauri are somewhat uncomfortable members. So, that's the EU. Meanwhile, through a combination of mad circumstances, the Centauri find themselves ruled by a spectacularly weak Regent (May), who is being influenced or controlled by shadowy figures called the Drakh (Boris, Gove).

And following a further sequence of events, apparently caused by the Centauri, but really brought about by the secret influence of the Drakh, the Centauri Empire declare that they are leaving the Interstellar Alliance in order to stand alone. So far, so Brexit-y.

Unfortunately, what happens next is "The Fall of Centauri Prime", and a generation of misery for the people of that Republic.

The Passing of Irn Bru

Today I finally saw news that I'd been expecting, and dreading, for a year: Barrs have decided to reduce the sugar content in Irn Bru, replacing it with artificial sweeteners. Come January next year, barring a miraculous reversal of this nonsense, I will have to give it up.

And there I was thinking that 2017 hadn't been as bad as 2016.

Captain Ric: To Infinity and Beyond

Terrible news, folks: RiCiCles are being withdrawn from sale. The age old battle between tiger and spaceman has ended in the only way that it could, with the demise of our beloved mascot Captain Ric.

Fortunately, Coco Pops and Frosties remain safe.

For now.

Justice League

LC and I finally made it out to the "Justice League" film last night, one of four (I think) we're still hoping to see before the end of the year (the others being "The Man Who Invented Christmas", possibly "Coco", and of course "The Last Jedi").

But before that, a word about Vue cinemas: I can't say I'm impressed. There are a number of reasons for this. One is the price, which is significantly higher than Cineworld (which was already getting out of hand). A second is that they're still stuck in the dark ages of charging a booking fee for ordering online (it should be the opposite - if we're booking online, not only are we paying in advance, and for tickets we might end up not even using, but we're also saving you staffing costs). The third is the absence of any sort of Unlimited card - given the above, that would be a major boon.

But my biggest issue is the concessions stand. Now, my understanding is that these days cinemas, even grotesquely overpriced cinemas, actually barely break even on the films, and instead make their money on the drinks, popcorn, etc. So I do generally take the view that if you want those things you should get them (and, in particular, not sneak in your own, reasonably-priced, drinks and snacks). However, the flip side of that is that the cinemas really need their staff to be on the ball - it's no good if you get to the cinema, find there's virtually no queue, and then still have to wait to be served, wait while the staff mess around with something else (in this case, "no milk!"), then have to repeat your order several times, and then eventually get it.

On the plus side, that disappointment prepared me nicely for the film.

"Justice League" is fine. It's far, far better than "Batman v Superman", though not as 'good' as "Wonder Woman" (though that film is also vastly overrated - probably due to a combination of being a DC film that doesn't suck, and also being a female-led superhero film that actually made money). There's nothing much wrong with it: there's a coherent story, with a beginning, middle, and end; the actors do their jobs well enough; there's at least some little hint of levity and humour. Basically, it doesn't suck.

But... there's also not really anything in the film that really demands a viewing, and certainly not at £30 for two tickets plus popcorn.

To be honest, I think the only thing in the film that really made any impression was the music, and in particular the reuse of the old Danny Elfman "Batman" theme and the John Williams "Superman" theme. On the one hand, this was a great move, since those are great themes (and since the latest DC versions don't have good themes for those characters). On the other hand, the biggest effect of this was to remind me of other, older versions of the characters that, frankly, I liked more - it's not that Cavill is doing a bad job as Superman, but he's just not Christopher Reeve; and it's not like Affleck's Batman is bad, as such, but both Bale and Keaton did it better.

So, yeah. "Justice League" is okay. But I have no burning desire to see it again, and frankly I'd recommend going to see "Thor: Ragnarok" a second time instead. Or just watching the "Infinity War" trailer, which packs more greatness in two minutes.

So... Christmas

One of the issues caused by the adverts starting Christmas in July is that it means that as we get towards the end of November I invariably find myself starting to worry because I've barely started yet. Indeed, as a matter of principle I won't be starting my 'real' preparations for Christmas until next Sunday, with the ceremonial decorating of the tree. (Though I have purchased a gift - the office are doing "Secret Santa" this year, and so the deadline for that one is rather earlier than the rest.)

That said, my plans are somewhat advanced for this year, notably in that I have an actual plan.

This year represents the start of me getting properly organised for Christmas, per my guide of last year. That being the case, I've set up my Christmas folder, established the three documents I'll need, and thus got the paperwork ready to record the steps. I've also discussed with LC what we'll be doing in general terms - so I know that in addition to the tree we'll be adding some new decorations for the rest of the house; I know I'll be doing a little, but not much, Christmas cooking; and I know that we'll be heading to the Christmas market in the near future.

Of course, the main thing that I have not done, is come up with much of a list of potential Christmas gifts for other people to get me. The big problem is that there's very little I want or need, and of those things that I do need (mostly, replacements for things that have worn out), my needs are very specific - it's all well and good saying I could do with some band kit, but the reality is that I'll need to pick that out for myself to ensure I get the right size/colour/etc.

But that's not a bad starting point for still being a week short of December.

The Alex Salmond Show

Thanks to the vociferous outrage of the Scottish media, I recently became aware that Alex Salmond has a new show on RT (formerly "Russia Today"). Furthermore, given just how angry the subject made them, I felt I just had to check it out. I'm sure Alex is absolutely gutted at the coverage.

Anyway... it's not great. From the opening credits, which look and feel much like a low-budget equivalent of the Andrew Marr show (lots of Alex walking around, all dramatically shot, but a bit pompous for my taste) through to Alex's presenting style (which I would categorise as "reasonably-good amateur"... which is probably about right), through to their almost determined need to prove they're not Kremlin stooges by calling out Russia/Putin at just about every opportunity.

But...

On the other hand, in the first week the show had an in-depth interview with Carles Puigdemont. Given how poor the media's coverage of the situation in Catalonia, that was most welcome. (And, it should be noted, my opinion on Catalan independence matches that of Alex: I don't have an opinion on whether Catalonia should or should not become independent, but I'm very much of the opinion that that's a matter for the Catalan people to decide.) In the second week, it had a detailed interview with Jackie Stewart that I didn't think would be interesting but which, in the event very much was - his thoughts on both dyslexia and dementia were definitely worth hearing. And despite my distaste for Alastair Campbell, it was worth hearing him stating his case on Brexit (or, rather, the need to call it off).

So, given that, I'm inclined to keep viewing. The presentation of the show isn't great, but hopefully that will improve with time. But the content, which really is the main thing, seems to be well worth seeing.

I guess I should thank the outrage machine of the UK media - if they hadn't spent so much time and effort telling me why I shouldn't watch, I probably wouldn't have known there was something to see.

(One other thing: one of the things I appreciate about the show is that I don't agree with everything that is said. As I said, Alastair Campbell in particular is not my favourite person in the political sphere. The thing is, being exposed to arguments you don't agree with is a good thing - it forces you to justify why you don't agree with them, which helps to refine your thinking.)

Experimental Cookery 2017: Sausage and Chestnut Pasta Bake

This one comes from the "Bake-off Winter Kitchen" cookbook which, it's fair to say, is not one of my most-used tomes. Indeed, it mostly gets used for the tomato sauce for pizzas, which isn't exactly challenging! So this week's experimental cookery was welcome, if for no other reason than that it gave some slight justification for keeping that book - there may need to be another clear-out soon, and a few of the lesser lights will no doubt go at that time.

Being a pasta bake, this meal wasn't exactly hard - there were a few minutes of prep, a few minutes of pre-cooking some of the ingredients, then it all got mixed together and put in a dish, and it went into the oven. Easy.

The resulting meal was also quite enjoyable - it's something I'll probably do again, though it doesn't exactly threaten any of my "nominated nine". My only slight criticism was that the recipe as given resulted in way too much food - even cutting the quantities in half (from 4 servings to 2) left a huge amount over. Still, this wasn't too terrible, as it saved LC from making lunch for the next day.

All in all, I think that was a winner.

#52: "Beren and Luthien", by J.R.R. Tolkien
#53: "Witch Wraith", by Terry Brooks

Pining for the Golden Age

Just after the Brexit referendum there was a brief spell between David Cameron tendering his resignation to the Queen and Theresa being asked to form a new government. During that time, we technically didn't have a government, and the highest-ranking figure in Downing Street was Larry the Cat.

Any chance we could go back to those halcyon days? Because, frankly, no government is better than a bad government.

#50: "Pathfinder: Into the Shattered Continent", by Robert Brookes
#51: "Bloodfire Quest", by Terry Brooks

Germinal

As I noted in my previous post, at the weekend I finished the 49th book of this year, "Germinal" by Zola, which is a book from the list. After some consideration, I have decided that it is not the book of the year, but it is very good.

Like "The Grapes of Wrath", I found that it depressed and angered me in equal measure. Angered because of the manifest injustice depicted in the novel (although, it should be noted, it was decidedly, and deliberately, one-sided). Depressed because the novel, despite being more than a hundred years old, could very easily have been written about Thatcher's Britain... and removed from the context of a miners' strike specifically it could have been written about in-work poverty today.

(It also didn't help that it was clear, pretty much from the outset, that those who thought of themselves as the saviours of the strikers were manifestly not suited to the job, whether due to self-interest or simple naivety. Indeed, the person with the clearest vision of how genuine change might come about turned out to be an utter, utter bastard... which, yes, is about right.)

Even the supposedly upbeat ending is pretty depressing - the protagonist walks away hopeful that change is coming, and change did indeed come. Unfortunately, the name for that change was "the Russian Revolution", which didn't go so well.

So, can I recommend it? Well, um... maybe. If you're in the mood for a French novel about a doomed miners' strike, and all the poverty and despair that goes with it, I guess so. But if you like happy books, not so much.

Experimental Cookery 2017: Lemon Chicken

Somewhere in all the excitement of last week, I forgot to write up the latest Experimental Cookery. This was another entry from the Hairy Dieters' third book "Good Eating" (the green cover). By my count, this is the weakest of the books to date, possibly excluding their "Go Veggie" book (which I haven't tried), but it's still not bad - it's just that the one with the Yellow cover takes some beating.

Anyway, this meal was quick and easy to produce - just chop some ingredients, mix them in the right order, stir-fry a bit, and serve. All in all, it took about 30 minutes end to end.

And it tasted fine - this was another one that I'm sure we'll do again, though perhaps not right away. It's a good one to have in the repertoire, but not an everyday staple.

So, that's another win. I'm not sure when the next Experimental Cookery will be - I'm running a little low on inspiration right now. But hopefully not too long...

#49: "Germinal", by Émile Zola (a book from The List)

Day 300: Update on Goals

And so we come to the penultimate update on goals for the year (the final one coming in the end-of-year wash-up):

• Weight: Nothing to report here.
• Books: By day 300 I should have read 49.3 books. I'm currently at 48.8 books, so I'm very slightly behind here. However, I'm more or less up-to-date on all the sublists, so that's okay.
• Super Secret Goal #4: This was completed on the 4th of August. Hurrah!
• Part Five: The House: We're now rapidly getting through the to-do list associated with the house. The redecoration of the two rooms is on hold, but the other tasks are proceeding apace, with new furniture gradually arriving, cables being cut and tidied (ish), and so on. So while there's still a lot to do, this is looking good.
• Part Five: Church: We have now tried three of the local churches, and are planning to try two more, then try one of the existing ones again, and then make a decision. Right now, we're leaning towards going back to the very first church we tried, but that remains to be confirmed.
• Part Five: Band: I have now joined the non-competing band that I mentioned at the last update, which should serve to keep me practicing.
• Part Five: Gaming: I recently took part in my first game session of 2018, and have a couple more planned. My intention is to retain my ties to the game group in Falkirk, but keep my schedule relatively light, and it may be a very long time before I run a game again. Whether I continue to play after Tadpole arrives remains very much uncertain.
• Super Secret Goal #5: N/A

The latter half of this year has all be a bit of a mess because of everything that has been going on, but I think the news is mostly positive. My expectation is that at the end of the year I will have completed two of the 'main' goals (and discarded a third), while of the "Part Five" goals two are now dealt with and another will be completed in the next month or so.

That leaves two: once again the "weight" goal will fail abysmally, while the work on the house will be advanced but probably not complete by the end of the year.

All in all, I think I can live with that.

#46: "A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms", by George R.R. Martin
#47: "The View From the Cheap Seats", by Neil Gaiman
#48: "Wards of Faerie", by Terry Brooks

The ReBoot Conundrum - solved

About a year ago, I posted that I had decided that it was time to get rid of my Region One DVDs, but that there was an issue with some few discs that couldn't be replaced with Region Two equivalents, most notably the series "ReBoot".

Well, the good news is that I have been handed a solution that works out great, and will allow me to keep access to those few discs that can't be replaced. Huzzah!

It's still my plan to replace those discs I had selected for that fate, and also to get rid of the number of discs entirely - although this same solution would work for all the Region One discs, I'm preferring to use it only as necessary, rather than default.

24 Legacy

I'm fairly late to the party, but I finally got around to watching the 'new' series of "24" over the weekend. It was interesting, but very flawed.

The big problem, I think, is that "24" basically became its own genre of TV. By which I mean that there are a number of things that have to be in a series of "24", without which the viewer would feel cheated, and the plot largely exists to move the story from one of these things to the next. So, there has to be a mole somewhere in CTU, there has to be at least one section where the main character goes off-book, there have to be political shenanigans. And so on and so forth.

What that means is that "24 Legacy" was pretty much just "24 by numbers" - do the one thing, then the next thing, then the next, and we're done. Add to that the pressure of having to introduce an all-new cast of characters and a reduction from 24 episodes to 12, and you've got problems.

But it's probably also worth noting that what made "24" so compelling, especially in the early years, was that it gave us something genuinely new, at least in TV terms - it was the show that would go to places that other shows just wouldn't. As the series progressed, and it became more and more self-referential, it also lost that edge. And a remake that does "24 by numbers" lacks the edge and, I'm almost shocked to say, becomes actually quite boring in places - you know that this has happened and we're at that part of the story, so what happens next must be...

Anyway, if you're a fan of "24" and liked "Live Another Day", you'll probably like "24 Legacy". If you're a fan of "24" who didn't like "Live Another Day", you probably won't. If you didn't like "24", you probably won't like this. And if you haven't seen "24" but like action series, you probably would like this... but would be better seeking out the original instead.

Given that "24 Legacy" has been cancelled, of course, much of this is moot. But since they're apparently working on a new form for the show, some further thoughts:

• I don't agree with the argument that "24" needs Jack Bauer. Jack was a great character, but other great characters are possible, and there's no reason the format needs him.
• However, "24" does need two core elements in order to work: it absolutely must keep the real-time aspect (and, for goodness sake, don't cheat - if it takes 20 minutes to drive from A to B in the real world, it should take 20 minutes in the show, no matter how inconvenient that is); it is absolutely must have the full 24 episodes. If you can't commit to both of those, don't bother.
• If you're doing a reboot, do a reboot. Name-checking Edgar and having Tony re-appear was quite cool, but it also meant that "24 Legacy" was inviting comparison with a vastly-superior original.
• When constructing any new series, the first thing to do is throw away the playbook. As I noted above, the great joy of "24" was that it showed us something we hadn't seen before, so do that... and that means showing us things that "24" hasn't shown us before as well. So subvert those expectations.
• Everyone should be expendable. And by 'everyone', I mean everyone. By series six or so of the old show, Jack and Chloe had achieved plot immunity, which meant that the peril they faced in the course of their adventures was inherently lessened. The moment that happens, and a character's life becomes safe, that character absolutely must be killed off. Then deal with the fallout.

That's what I think, anyway.

A Matter of Genetics

I should probably apologise for another post about Scottish football so soon, but something has really been bugging me since Sunday's match - specifically, Gordon Strachan's comment that part of the issue is genetic, in that Scottish players are on average smaller than most other Europeans. (Well, except those minnows of the footballing world, Spain, of course. But since they never win a match I guess we can discount them as being irrelevant...)

Bluntly, Scotland's problem isn't a matter of genetics; it's mostly a matter of mindset.

Scotland seems to delight in "glorious failure" - we consistently do almost well enough. And when the inevitable failure comes, it gets chalked up as another glorious failure, a mark of progress. Or, of course, we point to some singular bit of ridiculous bad luck, or a woeful refereeing decision, or something, and blame everything on that.

This applies to football, to rugby... and to most other areas as well. Even our history is littered with glorious failure, even such as William Wallace or the Darien Scheme. (And that's a ridiculously high-level summary.)

(Incidentally, Andy Murray is the exception that proves the rule. I'll get back to that.)

The problem with glorious failure is that it is, ultimately, still failure. And since winning and losing are both habit forming, that's a big problem.

But the genetic argument is nonsense, as evidenced by, yes, Spain. And the argument that we're making progress is likewise nonsense - by that metric, we've made more progress than just about any other country on the planet. Odd that we still keep falling short.

But back to Andy Murray. For years, he was yet another Scot who displayed all the traits associated with glorious failure - he'd keep doing quite well, but then he'd come up against Federer or one of the other big guns, and then he'd lose. Only he wouldn't lose every time. In fact, he was quite capable of beating Federer except when it 'mattered'. But on those occasions... glorious failure.

And then he hired Ivan Landl as his coach, and within a very short time he was Wimbledon champion, and things went from there. Lendl's main impact on Andy Murray's game? It was about the mindset of a champion - Andy Murray already had all the tools he needed to win, he just needed a few tweaks to his game... and a shift to his expectations from "I'll try" to "I will".

(Incidentally, that's why Murray was right that Mauresmo was a perfectly fine choice of coach. No, there wasn't really much she could teach him about the game, but then that was true of just about anyone he could have chosen. But she undoubtedly knew what it took to be champion, and it was that mindset, more than anything else, he needed. Alas, it didn't work out, but that doesn't mean the selection process was wrong.)

So, as I said once before, a long time ago, the problem with Scottish football is that we expect to lose in the big matches. And we grind out draws in the must-win matches, or we otherwise fall short.

Sunday's score against Slovenia was a good result - 2-2 against tough opponents, away from home, where the opposition hadn't conceded a goal on their home soil? Yeah, that's a good result.

The problem was that we needed to win, not draw, and we should never have been in that position to start with - the damage was done much earlier in the competition when we scraped a 1-1 draw against Lithuania at home. That was the must-win match, and we blew it.

For us to make real progress, the mindset has to change. We should treat every match as a must-win match, and when we're playing the supposedly 'lesser' teams, especially at home, we need to deliver that win. Get in the habit of winning, and success will follow. And stop talking about 'progress' when you mean 'failure'.

Incidentally, that's why my threshold for us achieving qualification is independence - not because independence has anything directly to do with football, but because of the question of mindset. A country that does not have the confidence to believe it can run itself is not a country likely to have the confidence to compete on the world stage. And while a lot of people voted against independence for a lot of reasons, the bottom line is that an awful lot of people accepted that we were just too poor to give it a go. There is a positive argument for the union, but that wasn't the argument that won it - "what currency will we use?" was the refrain.

Of course, it's possible for the football team to adopt the winning mentality without the country following suit, but I just don't see it.

Dear BT Sport...

Look, I understand that you would like feedback, and don't mind you contacting me with the occasional survey.

But...

When I've been working on your survey for 10 minutes and the status bar says I'm only 22% of the way through, then you're taking the piss. Frankly, if I've been working on your survey for 10 minutes, that's already too long. A survey should be five minutes or less.

Experimental Cookery 2017: Beef Stroganoff

In theory, I really like beef stroganoff. But I say "in theory" because all of my attempts to make it have met with abject failure - indeed, to the point of leaving me quite ill at times. Plus, it's not something I get to try very often; being a mushroom-based meal, it's not something LC will even try.

However, LC was late home last night, which meant I was left to fend for myself. And I had recently found yet another take on it, this one from the second "Hairy Dieters" book, so...

As always, the meal was quick and easy to put together, rendered only slightly more awkward because I forgot to put the rice on until late in the process. But that was okay - the sauce also took longer to thicken than I'd expected, which allowed me to bring it all together.

And the result was fine. Not the greatest thing ever, but a massive improvement on previous efforts, and no signs of food poisoning. So that's a win... sort of. That said, I'm not sure I'm really keen to try this again. It was fine, but not exactly the greatest thing ever.

Wish I Could Say I Was Surprised

The worst thing about supporting Scotland is the hope. After a very poor start to our qualifying campaign, the team somehow managed to turn it around and get themselves into a position where two wins in the last two games would win them a play-off spot, and then they managed a jammy last-minute winner in the first of those two matches. (Well, I say 'somehow'. But the answer is actually fairly simple: Scott Brown came out of retirement.)

Of course, I've predicted before that we weren't going to the World Cup, and indeed that we won't be going to any major tournament for the foreseeable future. (Well, unless they change the rules and just let everyone in.) But I did kind of expect the team to manage a win - and then get drawn against Italy, pull off a remarkable 0-0 draw in the first (away) leg, and so know that they only needed one heroic performance, at home, to get through... and then be denied at the last gasp in truly outrageous style. Because Scotland specialise in failing in the most painful way possible, and the was about as bad as I could come up with.

But even that was not to be. About a week ago, Scott Brown got injured and had to pull out. Faced with that, and faced with two very tough games, the manager decided to revert to "tried and tested" players - relying on experienced heads to keep it together to see him through.

Just one problem with that: those players had indeed been tried and tested. Unfortunately, in that testing they had been found wanting. If the definition of madness is trying the same things over and over and expecting different results... well. (Of course, he could have gone with young new, in-form players, and we still wouldn't have qualified. See above.)

So, what now?

Well, we try again next time. After all, you have to, don't you? And we'll need a new manager - Strachan did a mostly decent job, and it's hard to see who would do any better, but he's had two attempts and two failures, so we need to try something different.

Mostly, though, the answer is "nothing". I'm sticking with my prediction: unless they change the rules to massively expand the number of teams that qualify, or unless we amalgamate the leagues and the national teams to compete as Team GB (or UK), Scotland won't make it to either a World Cup or a European Championships this side of independence (and if we never become independent, that means never).

#45: "Pathfinder: The Lost Outpost", by Jim Groves

Experimental Cookery 2017: Chicken Tagine with Preserved Lemons

The first Experimental Cookery of the new house is another entry from the second Hairy Dieters book (the one with the yellow cover). As I've noted before, I'm inclined to think this is the best of their diet books, although in fairness I haven't tried their fifth one since the notion of going veggie doesn't really appeal.

The meal itself was quick and easy to prepare, though it does take a while to cook - basically, you gather the ingredients, add them to a pan in several stages, and then simmer for 45 minutes or so. It's not difficult, and you can go do something else during that simmer step, but it's a good idea to start long before you actually want to eat - as we found to our cost.

It's also very tasty, with the preserved lemons making a big difference to the whole. LC also approved, though she doesn't like olives (which is an issue, since I suspect they're actually pretty integral to this meal - I don't think it would work without). I expect we'll have this again.

Khaaaaaan!

A decade ago, I had a bit of an issue with Scottish Gas, who messed up my gas bill and gave me a massive runaround trying to get it sorted. I was not best pleased and promptly decided never to give them my custom again. And so, when I bought the flat, it was with no small pleasure that I contacted one of their rivals to set up my account.

But a decade has passed since then, and in particular it was a decade where I had had occasion to make use of some of Scottish Gas' other services, notably their one-off boiler repair. And, having been pleased with that service, I removed them from my "never deal with these people" list.

Guess where this is going!

After signing up to receive gas and electricity from Scottish Gas, I was encouraged to sign up to have a Smart Meter installed. Which was a nice reminder and generally a good thing. And so I promptly did exactly that. That appointment was booked for today.

Being at work, I arranged for my father to house-sit today. Which isn't ideal, of course, since it's a big hassle for him, but it's a necessary consequence of having to work full-time. And so I came to work and waited for some indication that they were on their way...

After lunch, I decided to check the status of the appointment online, only to be met with a note that our boiler isn't suitable for a Smart Meter - they'd be in touch. Uh-oh...

So, I spent several minutes hunting down a way to actually contact them (which wasn't easy), and made the call.

And it turned out that their automated system can't accept bookings to install a Smart Meter within a month of a change of supplier. So it automatically cancelled the appointment and didn't deign to inform me.

I find myself at something of a loss as to how exactly to categorise this new level of incompetence. Is it where the system encourages you to book an appointment before they're able to accept the appointment? Is it that the system cancels the appointment without telling you? Or perhaps it lies in hiding the customer support numbers that you need in order to get any actual, usable information about this?

Incidentally, the automated switchboard informed me that Scottish Gas might call me back to get feedback on my experience today. If that does indeed happen, it will make for a very interesting conversation...

(It's worth noting, of course, that I'm not at all convinced the competition are any better. As far as I can tell, they're all pretty much equivalently shit. Something to do with them all providing the same gas/electricity via the same pipes/wires, and so meaningful competition being essentially impossible.)

#44: "Anne of Green Gables", by L. M. Montgomery (a book from The List)